CDMX3: A tiny circle grows
The littlest bit of our immediate neighborhood, the simplest of things.
I woke up this morning, after waking up a few times through the night: a bit cold under the flannel sheet and single fleece blanket, hearing the recorded things I don’t understand blaring loudly from a pickup truck, remembering where I am. When I finally woke up for good, it was 11:15 and I had been asleep for more than 11 hours.
The first feelings: happy and anxious. When I told partner, he asked, What are you anxious about and it felt hard to describe. Is it really the things I told him it boiled down to? The language, being in a new place, not having work I’m expected to do.
What do I do with my time? Am I doing this right? What if I can’t speak? What if I get locked out of my Airbnb? How do I function without cell service? How do I get myself to leave the apartment?
I woke up 30ish minutes before Valerie, thought about what to do.
Together, here, we are reading The Artist’s Way, and one fundamental part of it is what’s called Artist’s Pages — essentially just writing three full pages longhand every morning, right when you wake up. We decided we will do them, so after crawling out of bed I sat at the kitchen table and did. I journal rather incessantly, so it didn’t feel awkward or new, but I do wonder if it might do something new or different for me. I like the required length, and that it’s first thing in the morning, and I’m approaching it the way I did with my sixth graders and their journals: do your very best to not lift the pen from the page.
From there, I shifted my anxiety on my shoulders: should I go for a run while she sleeps and bring the keys? should I go for a walk through our immediate neighborhood? should I go buy un cafe for myself? Should I bring one for her?
I was in the middle of changing out of my jeans (intended for the walk) and into my leggings (for a run) when Valerie woke up and poked her head in my room.
I slept for way too long, she said.
What if we didn’t put parameters on ourselves for this trip? She slept for a long time because she was tired and the circumstances were right. I can go for a walk or a run or do nothing and it…
